Diamond Dog, My Derby Story

This entry in The Rollergirl Project is a small glimpse into the life of a derby girl. This entry is by Diamond Dog who skates with the Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls of Bloomington, IN. More pictures of her can be found at Cory's website

I got my first pair of roller skates for my 6th birthday in 1989. They were white with red wheels and they had Popples on the side. They were the best present ever!

I grew up on a quiet cul de sac in Noblesville Indiana with tons of kids. We would put on our roller skates and race down the street, I would tuck one arm behind my back and pretend to be Olympic speed skater Bonnie Blair. My sister would tie pillows to her butt so that she wouldn’t get hurt but I never wore any safety gear. Honestly it is amazing that I survived childhood with no broken bones. I jumped off the top of swing sets and climbed trees all day.

When I reached adulthood, I had become a teen mom to a kick ass set of twin boys. I had made friends with a few derby girls outside of the derby world, I also have a cousin who skates for Grand Raggidy so when my cousins team came down to play BHRG I went to watch a bout. I was in love! I wanted to do it so bad and I decided as a graduation present to myself I would start to play roller derby. I even picked out my derby name Diamond Dog 2 years before I started skating. The name comes from my undying love of my favorite singer David Bowie.

So, in 2011 a few months before I graduated I bought skates and gear and went to a BHRG skills camp. I thought, “I skated as a kid how hard can it be?” Well it took me that first skills camp to learn it was a lot harder than I thought. I realized that I could go forward on skates, but I couldn’t stop or turn really at all. I signed up for the boot camp and my first practice, I messed up a ligament in my knee. That was my first injury. After the boot camp was over, I went to the new skater program the DisOrderlies once a week and learned so much, like “Hey, guess what, I can stop now!” Not only that but I can do many different kinds of stops!

 

March 2012, I broke my wrist, that was a fun one because I went to a doctor twice in a two week period to be told I had a pinched nerve and finally went to the ER where the doctor told me I had a fracture that went in 3 different directions on my radius. Way to go urgent care clinic who misdiagnosed me.

The biggest critique that I always got from the coaches who watched us was that I needed to work on core more, I kept trying and it seemed like something was wrong so I went to a doctor during the off season and found out that I had a hernia. They did surgery and guess what; there were FOUR hernias, so that explains a lot. Now I’m back again and better than ever, I can do sit ups now when I couldn’t do those before. I’ve learned so much since I started skating. My next goal, besides making the league and a team, is to learn how to be a wrecking ball on the track.

So that is my derby story. You know that obnoxiously catchy song by Chumbawumba, Tub Thumping? That is my derby song, I get knocked down but I get up again, you’re never going to keep me down. Because I’ve gotten knocked down by injury a lot but it will never keep me down because I always get back up and put my skates back on and hit the track.

I love this sport so much, I always joke that I suffer from Derby Distraction Disorder because I think about it so much. My non derby friends don’t understand at all how wonderful derby is. I also love the league BHRG so much, it is the best group of people that I’ve ever met (besides my besties outside of derby ;) ) Everyone in BHRG is so encouraging and wonderful everyone brings their own unique skills to the table and it makes this wonderful organization. I am so glad that I started skating and wish that I had right after that first bout that I went to instead of waiting 2 years. And no matter how many times I get knocked down I will ALWAYS get back up and keep skating.

Becoming the Person I Want to Be

Every entry in The Rollergirl Project is a small glimpse into the life of a derby girl.  This entry is by Cruella DeKill who is currently on hiatus from Rollergirls of Southern Indiana.  More pictures of her can be found at Cory's website.

 Who are you?

Trinity is my name, but I'll also go by Cruella (DeKill), my skater name. I'm currently a student at the University of Southern Indiana. I'm studying Health Services with a concentration in Health Administration. I'm also a part time bookshelver at Central Library. I'm also a daughter of a wonderful mother and father, a sister of some awesome siblings, and a girlfriend of an amazing man.

How did you discover derby and what drew you to that first practice or meeting to create a league?

I discovered roller derby almost two years ago through a friend of mine. It was actually on MySpace. She posted a bulletin of a flier for a bout, and I decided to go to check it out - and when I went, I fell in love. I wanted to be part of their team. I started going to practices and eventually became a member of that team. After some time of being on that team, I became unhappy and learned about the other roller derby team in Evansville and decided to check them out. After attending one practice, I knew I wanted to be part of their team. They were all SO welcoming and understanding about my situation. I asked to resign from the team I was originally on, and then I became an official member of ROSI :) thank goodness!

Have your relationships with other women changed since joining? Friendships with rollergirls? Others?

I've met a lot of awesome girls, and I feel very privileged. Though I'm only close with a certain few, while I was actively attending practice, I learned how unique every single woman was. They all have awesome personalities and even though they're all different in a lot of ways, all together, they formed one of the strongest and most motivated teams I've seen. Even though we're not all very close, I appreciate every single one of them.

Derby wife - What does that relationship mean to you?

A derby wife is someone I can trust, rely on, and relate to in terms of derby. My wife, Rachel, also known as Iron Maim'em, is one of my favorite people, on and off the track. For as long as I can remember, we've always been on a similar skill level, so I always felt extremely comfortable skating with her and being her partner. Outside of derby, she's extremely easy to talk to and very understanding! She is currently inactive, like myself, due to injuries :( but I know that we'll be together on the track again one day, hopefully sooner than later, and I can't wait for it!!

Has there been a change to your professional life or relationships?

The semester before last, I had a difficult balancing school, work AND derby. I did poorly in a couple classes because I felt overwhelmed. I'm certainly not blaming derby; I'm blaming myself for not being able to do everything. So last semester, I decided to take a break from derby. I decided to concentrate on doing well in school and trying to find a new job - and I did just that. I got excellent grades and got a new job that I really like! I'm still currently on a leave of absence, just waiting to see how heavy my workload will be this semester, along with how my work schedule is. I LOVE derby and I do plan on getting back into it as soon as I can, but I've got other priorities to take care of first.

Has dating changed at all since joining? Harder? Easier?

Oh this question! Well, my relationship life since I've joined derby has been... interesting, to say the least. When I first joined the other team, I was dating this guy, it didn't last, we broke up. Shortly after is when I began realizing how unhappy I was on that team. Coincidentally, whenever I became interested in ROSI, I also became interested in a girl who was a member of ROSI. Well, one thing led to another, and we ended up dating for a little while. During our relationship, we had a tendency to skip practices, which was bad in the end for both of us. Anyway, everything got better because shortly after I started dating one of the referees on the team. Some teams would frown upon this, but I think we did a good job of keeping our personal life separate from derby. He and I have been together ever since! Needless to say, we've had some complications, but those complications will soon be completely resolved. If it weren't for roller derby, I wouldn't have met him. It's one of the many reasons why I'm grateful for derby.

Has your personality evolved at all since becoming involved?

My confidence has skyrocketed because of derby! Before I joined derby, I was very out of shape and had horrible self esteem. It took me a while, but I eventually got the motivation to start working out outside of practices and it's made me feel so much better about myself! I lost nearly twenty pounds over 2010 and a main New Year's resolution is to not so much concentrate on losing weight - but being healthy and staying healthy! Aside from having more self confidence, I've learned more about myself and I'm trying to come out of my shell. I think I'm too shy sometimes and derby has made me be a little bit more sociable!

How would you have described yourself before derby? How about after?

Before derby, I was unhealthy, extremely self conscious, and introverted. Now after experiencing derby, I'm on the track to being as healthy as I can be, more confident about myself (but not cocky!), and less shy. I'd becoming the person I want to be.

A large portion of photography is the physical self. When you look in a mirror, how did you describe yourself before and how do you describe yourself after?

Before, I would be disgusted to look at myself in the mirror, well, at least my entire body. I would avoid it most of the time. Now, I try not to focus on the negative and more of the positive. I try to concentrate on how I HAVE lost weight and toned up - even though I'm not where I want to be just yet. I appreciate the fact that it could always be worse. I admire what I do have, not what I don't have.

What makes you go to practice? What drives you to play? What is it that makes it worth the time, money and risk?

Before I had to take a break from derby, my drive was that derby was my outlet. It was a way to get out my anger and frustration, and it was something to look forward to since my days consisted of classes and work. I loved the feeling that I was becoming more athletic, because I had never been athletic before in my life. I loved feeling part of something, and when I pushed myself and worked hard and got appraisal for it, I felt so good about myself. I know that even though I haven't been around, my team will welcome me back with open arms. Because that's what we are, a team. We work together to stay strong. I'm SO glad I joined roller derby and found ROSI. Whether they know it or not, they have changed my life for the better. ♥

Quiet, Confident, and True to Herself

Every entry in The Rollergirl Project is a small glimpse into the life of a derby girl.  This entry is by Sauer Susi who skates for Rollergirls of Southern Indiana.  More pictures of her can be found at Cory's website.

Who are you? Mundane life... Derby life... the basics...

Mundane: Well, I’m Emily. I’m the small, quiet one. Recluse has been used by friends on more than one occasion, in a loving way, of course. It’s not that I dislike other people, or that I feel superior in any way, I just don’t have that need to be in constant company. My group of regular friends is small, and mostly comprised of males. I guess you could say I’m kind of a tomboy. I also don’t speak much. I never liked it when one person in a room would babble on and on about what was essentially nothing. If I don’t have anything to say, I’m comfortable with the silence, I don’t need to fill the room with words. On a more basic note (since I went off on a tangent there), I’ve worked at the same ice cream shop since my senior year of high school. I’m a German major, and I love everything about it. I’ve been to Austria twice, and it’s probably my favorite place. I’m also a twin, some people think that’s cool.
Derby: I’m Susi, blocker, former and maybe future jammer. I still have my quietness, but it doesn’t seem to bother anyone. I love to skate, and I love to be in the company of so many strong and independent women. I feel like the derby me is the same as “real” me, only on wheels and more prone to having something groped.

How did you discover derby and what drew you to that first practice?

I went to my first derby bout when I was 17 and a senior in high school. My older brother was (and still is) dating a member of ROSI. He thought I would like it, talked me into going, and from then on, I was hooked. I wanted to join and be awesome just like those girls. I had to wait until I was 18 of course, but when that came, I was there. Uncertain on skates and in super shy mode around those once strangers, but there none the less.

Have your relationships with other women changed since joining? Friendships with rollergirls? Others?

My relationships with other women haven’t changed for the most part. In school, I found a lot of girls to be kind of superficial, and I still see that a lot in my age group (I’m a whopping 20 years old). However, derby girls are a different story to me. They all seem confident in one way or another. Be it in themselves as a person or in their skills on the track, and I really, truly admire that. Not only in women, but in anyone.

Have your pre-derby relationships with friends and family changed?

My relationships with others haven’t really changed either. The friend group I have has changed, but not as a result of derby. Life makes its own changes. However, one friend did join derby with me, and its nice to have her to discuss derby and outside life. We’ve been friends since the 6th grade, gone our separate ways at times, but always found each other again. Other friends come to watch and cheer on the team, but it’s not the same as skating with them out on that track. And secretly, she was always my competition.

Derby wife - What does that relationship mean to you? How is it different then your other friends and team mates?

I’m currently single in the derby world.

Has there been a change to your professional life or relationships?

Like I mentioned before, I’ve worked at the same place for almost three years now. I’m still pretty young, and professional is not a word I use to describe myself. It’s something I’m still paying to get to.

Has your personality evolved at all since becoming involved?

Yes and no. I say that because while I still don’t feel the need to be around people, or to talk just to make noise, derby has given me more confidence in myself that allows me to be able to do that. I’ve always been a little socially awkward (backwards, as my grandma would say). I suppose part of that was insecurity, and part of it was just not caring (I think it’s important to be okay on your own, to not depend on other people to create your happiness). I can handle myself better in new situations. I’m not as shy, and I can make conversation with a stranger without feeling overwhelmed. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still shy to some degree, but not near as much as before. Before, I would never volunteer to be photographed, so you see my progress. Also, I used to be really particular about some things. For example, in school, I was the one that never got below a B. Not because my parents pressured me, but because I pressured myself. Since I’ve joined derby, and also traveled alone overseas, I’m a little more relaxed about things. I still like to do well, so I’m not just a slacker now, but I realize that it’s not as important as I was pushing it to be. So when I got my first C in college, I could deal with it. It wasn’t a big deal because hey, a C is still passing, and life is so much more than letters and numbers. If you worry about all the small things, it’s going to pass you by and in the end, do you want experiences, or a shiny report card? Well, I choose to experience things. And surprisingly, derby has made me a bit more girly. I know that reeking pads, sweat and bruises don’t scream femininity, but I did gain some in a way. I don’t spend big bucks on clothes or make up or anything like that, but sometimes it’s fun to just be a girl. You know, wear dainty dress even if you’ve got a nasty bruise. In fact, that makes it better in my opinion. Beauty with edge.

Have your attitudes towards different types of people changed?

I always liked to think that I was open minded. But when you go to a derby bout, there is truly every type of person. Despite having an open mind, it’s still amazing how sports can pull people together, even for a little while, because weather we want to believe it or not, people still draw dividing lines all the time.

How would you have described yourself before derby? How about after?

Quiet, awkward, and self conscious. Quiet, still kind of awkward (its genetic), with a healthy dose confidence.

A large portion of photography is the physical self. When you look in a mirror, how did you describe yourself before and how do you describe yourself after?

I won’t get specific here, but before when looking in a mirror, I could mentally tear myself apart with negative things. And honestly, I still could today if I tried, but I don’t do it. I’d still like to better myself, but I’m okay just being me. Derby has every shape and size, and each girl serves her own purpose.

Has your definition of beauty changed for yourself or others?

You are who you are, and its good to be happy with that. Don’t waste precious time worrying over some minor detail that the general public isn’t even going to notice. You are your own worst critic, and I do believe that. If someone wants to criticize you, they aren’t worth your time.

What makes you go to practice? What drives you to play? What is it that makes it worth the time, money and risk?

I’ve always been a fan of playing sports. I’ve done teams and individual sports. I think derby kind of combines those. Yes, it’s incredibly important to work well with your girls, to have that flow on the track. But it’s also important to be confident in your own ability, especially in certain positions. I like the competitiveness a sport gives. I’m not over the top with it though. I just like to go out and give my effort and hope its returned with a big fat win. But if not, it’s not the end of the world. I like the cliché idea of playing for fun, not just to win. On a social point, I like knowing every girl on my team. I don’t know them all intimately, but being a person who typically has male friends, it’s nice to have this group of girls. I like the person I have become as a result of derby.